A Cure for the Holiday Blues

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 With all the hustle and bustle, merrymaking and cheer, I can’t help but remember that this season can be such a bittersweet time for many of us.  As time marches on, most of us experience loss, heartbreak and bittersweet memories,  made more pronounced by all the ‘Joy to the World’ surrounding us.  There are loved ones we have lost through death or distance- lost loves, lost lives, lost homes, lost pets, the  broken hearts and dashed hopes of living life. I know… it’s not cheery, but it’s real.

 

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I know my own holidays of years past have included a divorce, 2 miscarriages and the loss of my dear dad nearly 4 years ago.  Nothing like spending a holiday season in the hospital with a loved one who has just received a sudden terminal diagnosis, to break your heart into a million pieces. I remember getting coffee at Starbucks, on a brief break from the hospital that Christmas. I was stunned at how life beyond the hospital could be moving on, so merrily, while my family was in complete crisis and heartbreak, praying for a miracle.  That said, there is nothing like a crisis in your life to build compassion for others experiencing heartbreak this season.

If you, like me, find yourself having those painful or bittersweet moments during the holidays please remember:

Take care of yourself….


 Whether it’s a special treat, a warm bath, a massage, a brisk walk in the chill air or a bouquet of fresh flowers.

 

Reach out to the open arms of friends and family who care. If your family is far away, create your own kind of family this season with new traditions. Heart warming movies, or funny movies, are always a mood booster. I double dog dare you to cry during the movie, “A Christmas Story”.

A Christmas Story (Full-Screen Edition)

Reach out to someone else who is lonely or in need.

Doing something good for someone is always my best ‘feel good’ advice.


As dark as times may be right now, there will be brighter, more peaceful days ahead.  If you are feeling discouraged and lonely, you never know what can happen ‘around the next corner’ to change everything about the way you are feeling.  Looking towards adventure is always a way to keep us focused on the next chapter. *Have hope~in yourself, in life and in your future.
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*Have hope~in yourself, in life and in your future.

*I know this for a fact…..my most recent “have hope” story happens to be about finding true love…at 82 years of age.   I mean it~anything can happen~anytime-so never, ever give up hope for fabulous curve ball in your future.

(*The love story–here it is)

If you happen to see a crazy driver or a person dabbing away a tear at your local coffee-house, be patient,

this time of year can be bittersweet for so many of us…….

Be of good cheer,

xx-

Shop the Stylemindchic Boutique for Christmas!

Images

Heather Lindstrom

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18 comments

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Dearest Heather – You are so inspirational; always giving and ever ready to share a glorious touch of style! This season I give Thanks for the birth of my Savior, Jesus … He is my Hope in good times and bad! I celebrate gift of life that He offers to all who seek Him in Spirit and Truth. Merry Christmas to you and your beautiful family
– With Love, Gretchen

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Such a beautiful post Heather! I remember when you were in the hospital, and was so worried about you. This season has held many sad memories for me as well. Why does it seem so much sadder and tragic at this time of year? I try to focus on improving it for others as best I can. Helping others always makes me feel better.
Let’s talk soon.
XX Jennifer

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Wow!!! I SO needed this post Heather. This year saw me lose my beloved Dad, and I last spoke to him on Christmas Day 2014 before he had a stroke. So this whole month I have been re-living every single day, conversation, thought…….all over again. Thank you for this lovely post, that is such a great reminder that it is not always baubles and frolics xx

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I was thinking of you and your loss of your dad, Vannessa. The last lucid day we had with my dad was on Christmas day 2008 in the hospital. We had an amazing conversation. That day was such a gift. I know that some of your memories already feel like gifts–and as you walk through your process of grief I know that you will experience more peace.
Hugs today,
xx

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This is such a helpful post Heather, so filled with compassion and a reminder that we all can use during this busy season. I also remember leaving the hospital once, after days of sleepless worry and walking out into the sunshine feeling like I’d been living in another much darker world. Surprised at how life was continuing along despite all our family’s personal angst. Similar to your own experience. Your suggestions are wise and ones I’ve used myself. And hey, I have to catch up on your life—what’s this about a big trip coming up? I’m excited to hear more. We’ve been traveling a lot lately and I’m actually looking forward to being home and getting some decorations up :)
hugs to you,
Leslie

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I can tell this post resonated with you, Leslie. Thank you for your kind words. I don’t think we can escape some of the bittersweet qualities when we truly live and love in life. Enjoy your cozy and festive time at home my dear!
xx

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Hi Heather…Wow…talk about a post speaking to you! As I read this in the early morning darkness after yet another sleepless night, it touched me so deeply with what I am going through this holiday season. I am struggling to make it through my days and can barely think about the holidays. I need to pull myself out of this so I don’t let my family down. This weekend will be all about slowing down, trying to enjoy the season (despite of how I feel) and seeking a little holiday joy. Thank you SO much for this beautiful post! xoxoxoxo

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I had you, and a few other bloggers and friends, in mind when I published this post, dear Sandy. Losing a family member is never easy and the first holidays following a loss are such a challenge. I feel for you with the sleepless nights as you walk through the grieving process. Please do take time for self-care and go easy on yourself during this holiday season. Your family will understand and will appreciate YOU for giving as you can but not overdoing. Hoping some new traditions and sweet memories bring some smiles for you this season, dear Sandy.
xx

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Yes my friend, I too get the blues from Christmases past. The loss of my parents, my aunts and uncle, all of these people added to the joy of Christmas. The recent death of a cousin as well has left my little family a bittersweet memory of the fun he would create for us cousins who are left. Now, me and my beloved husband have one another to create memories that one day for one of us, will be bittersweet but GOOD memories. Oh, such is life.

The photos you are sharing here are OUTSTANDING. That aqua blue touch reminds me of my childhood Christmases at a relatives home…..great memories. But the best remedy to beat the blues IS to reach out. Do you follow Elizabeth on Pinecones and Acorns? PLEASE see her post. She has 10 great “gifts” you can give that don’t cost a cent. Go visit and see.

Much love. Anita

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What a gift that husband is to you, Anita. You have experienced such losses in life yet are building traditions and beauty into your life in the present. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your cousin. I must read Elizabeth’s post-thank you for the suggestion.
Thinking of you during the holidays, dear Anita!
xx

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Oh, Heather, thank you for prompting me so that I wouldn’t miss this beautifully warm and compassionate post! Wow, hit me right in the heart! Touched on many many things going on in my heart, as well, as my life, and with what I am working to do about all of it! When you describe the events in life that you have dealt with, I feel a bond (even though it’s cyber). I can feel all the emotion that surrounded your life with each heart wrenching event, along with what it did to prepare you for the next phase of life. I appreciate you and your heart! Thank you for this post! I really needed it!! xoxo

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Shelly, bless your sweet heart…it means so much to me to know that my words, thoughts and/or experiences can encourage others. I did have you, as well as a couple of other friends, on my mind when I wrote this post. It had to be said….. The holidays can be such a mix for some of us and if you are experiencing additional challenges in life, it can feel downright brutal during this season. In your inspired blogging and thoughtful comments over the last number of months I already know that you have deep faith, Shelly. I am also wishing for you strength, peace, clarity and hope to go along with it. You are walking through a valley right now but I am absolutely certain things will look brighter soon. In the mean time….thinking of you, my sweet friend (cyber soul mate:)
xx, Heather

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Great post. Thanks for thinking of all those who aren’t so merry right now..I like your positive thoughts too.

xo
Kim

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Thanks Kim! There are so many who are struggling this season I wanted to show support in some way. It is so true about how life can take a positive turn around the next corner! ;). Love it when you stop by!
Cheers, xx Heather

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Heather

Thank you for reminding us of what is really important this time of year! Sometimes we get caught up in the festivities and forget to stop and think! Have a fabulous time in Paris!

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Hi Cindy,
I guess it’s the psychologist in me, but sometimes I have to focus on that balance in life.
I’m so glad you understand. On the other hand, your gorgeous photos of your holiday decor are an inspiration to me. What a talent! I am excited about our trip-thank you
and merci! ;)
Cheers, xx Heather

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you have hit the nail on the head on so many levels with this post, Heather!! Thank you for such beautiful pictures to remind us all of the beauty in the world…and to remind all to take time to experience all the goodness and sorrows of life. love to you, my friend!!!

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Thank you Val! Coming from you, my dear friend, colleague and a professional therapist, that means so much. I know you understand my sentiments. Thanks for checking in. I always love it when you stop by Stylemindchic.
xx, Heather

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